i'm alright in bed, but i'm better with the pen.

wow. what a week. i mean, really.
friday, i was dating anthony. i broke up with him on sunday. :T for a legit reason, nothing to do with him. monday, i started dating khris. unfortunately, my parents made us break up on TUESDAY. holy shit. so basically, the past 7 days have been rough for me. but im hanging in there. me and anthony are okay, friendship wise, thank. god. i dont know what i'd do if i lost that kid as a friend<3. me and khris are still on amazing terms and is still making me smile more than anything. but yeah... that has been MY week.

spending time with my friends has helped me loads and just talking to people when i need it. im currently sick, which means im home more than usual and that's driving me NUTS. but it's okay. saturday, i spent the entire day on my couch, watching movies with my sister. that was a good break. i want to stay home from school, but at the same time, i actually like going and seeing my friends everyday. so ehh. i'll deal with the illness for now and continue going till i cant anymore.

through extreme ups and downs, im still a strong bitch and no one's gonna take that from me. :)

this week has been. woaahh. ups, downs, and stuff in between.
monday was a pretty okay day. everything was decent up til thursday night, when things went a little sour for me. only for me to realize in the end that everything was going to be okay. yesterday was an amazing day. anthony and i are going out<3 and it's quite an odd feeling, i must say. as you could imagine, this is a really weird situation for me if you know me well enough. but i must say, im happy.

last night, i went to medieval times with tatiana and brianna for tati's 17th birthday, which was on monday. i missed spending time with them. :D i then slept over at tatiana's house and that was an interesting experience. cuz bri didnt let me sleep a wink until about 5 am. -_- but it was an eventful, great evening. when we woke up, we got ready and went to ihop, where i stuffed myself with delicious breakfast goods. nom nom nom.

tomorrow im dropping by at melanie's house for a while. just because. i wanna get my homework done but i copied the wrong shit for homework, so i dont know what to do. XD monday im going to the museum of modern art with khris to see the tim burton exhibit :D :D :D so happy. i miss him like crazy. a day out at the museum with my favorite? uhm, i couldnt ask for anything more.

xo-olivia

the best parts of the year involve spending time with amazing people, such as khris, doryan, jac, rob, my band nerds, and of course, my family. my sister's wedding was an amazing night i'll never ever forget that i spent with the best. i wish i could re-live that night, as well as many other days spent with people i love the most. low points were the unexpected passing of my godfather and random jabs to the heart. but everything's okay. this year was great. :)

so im currently on christmas vacation, which has been great so far. i did (almost) all of my homework, so im basically free to do whatever my little heart desires. things have been going well, i guess. though, these past few weeks have been a little rough. my godfather died, which was something no one was expecting. i regret not talking to him for all these years and im definitely going to miss him terribly. though, i have amazing friends that got me through hard times.

i've been a little sad panda, for various reasons, lately, but im doing a little better as time goes on. the stress is starting to be lifted off my shoulders. i did two christmas shows at school, which went great. i had a lotta fun playing those with the people i love. but the 60s revue is coming up. tomorrow i have rehearsals. all next week is hell week, which means very very long days of rehearsals. then the show starts next friday until sunday. i hope it goes well.

this year went by very very quick. im actually sad it's ending. lots of highlights, lots of terrible parts as well. i spent most of the year around people i adore, and i cant ask for anything more that. i hope next year will be even better. if not, im gonna be super uber bummed.

im gonna be spending new year's eve with family and jack's family and friends which will be great. saturday, i might be seeing khwis, and that makes me happeh. :) i wanna start 2010 right.

2009 was a great year. here's some pictures of the highlights of the year. :) actually, there's a lotta pictures. so beware of the cut. XD

( one year. )

christmas is in 20 days. can you believe it? i cant. i couldnt even believe thanksgiving came up so quick. this year went entire too fast. im going to make the best out of this next month. i want to remember this year as a great year, nothing less.

today i am going to a christmas party. im pretty excited. i love parties, especially when they're for christmas. :) i have a nice outfit to wear, which is nice. i love getting dressed up.

this past week has been a little crazy. i had rehearsals on wednesday and it was a bit stressful and tiring, but it was okay. i just need to learn 20+ songs within a month. it's hard trying to juggle the revue and the christmas show, which is in about two weeks and i still havent learn all the songs for that yet. i neeeed christmas break. desperately. i can now go out without my dad freaking on me, so this christmas break, i could finally chill with people i've been wanting to for a while. :)

i think it's almost time to get dressed and such. my hair needs to be straightened and make up needs to be done. it might snow today, which makes me a happy elf. ^_^

things are starting to get better. i guess everything's still kinda rocky and there's still a bumpy road ahead of me. but i have some hope now. i think im going to be okay.

this past week has been interesting. i only had monday and tuesday of full classes and wednesday, i was home by noon-ish. then i went to see mc chris at the knitting factory in brooklyn. the opening acts were fucking awesome and mc chris was great, of course. i saw my dearest khwis<3. he makes my shitty moods disappear. thursday was thanksgiving. my family came over and we had a nice dinner. free from drama, thank god. i ate entirely too much and didnt gain any weight! whatthefuck! i need to gain weight. D;

yesterday was black friday. we usually go into the city, but we decided against it. instead, me, mel, jack, heather, and jeff went to ihop in the morning then walked around atlas for a while. we came back to the house and everyone else played beatles trivial pursuit. XD i didnt play cuz i knew i'd lose. i was supposed to go to rocky horror last night but people suck and were like "we're tiredddd. blah blah blahhhh!" yeah. so that didnt happen. i ended up staying up until 1-ish anyway, talking to my dearest. i love talking to khwis. even tho i felt like a complete and utter zombie.

today im decorating for christmas! im excited. even tho it's gonna be a lot of work. :)

so what's new with me, you ask.

im convinced i'll be dead by the end of november, mid december if i get lucky. i have never been so stressed out in my entire life. school is terrible. this time last year, i was excited to get up in the morning to go to school and see people i enjoyed seeing everyday. unfortunately this year, i dont have that luxury. my favorite part of the day is being able to sleep, but there's a downside to even that, which is i wake up a thousand times more upset than i did before i fell asleep. going to school makes me ridiculously depressed. im being worked to the core and i shouldnt be.

for the next two weeks, i dont think im getting a break. and when i do, i'll use that time to study for the stuff that is taking up more of my free time. im being forced into things i'd rather not do and that's piling up ridiculously and making matters even worse.

i didnt think that at the beginning of this year, i'd break down. and if i did, i didnt think it would happen this fast. unfortunately, i did. i broke hard.

i stayed home today because i woke up feeling ridiculously sick and my head is aching so bad. i dont know if i should blame sinuses or stress. i think both. even tho i took a sick day, im still going to have to work and practice for my performance exam, which at this point, i really dont care if i pass or not. i want to eat so i can take something to make my head feel better, but im sick to my stomach because i just cant handle this anymore. so my stomach continues to hurt and my head is killing me. im tired because im afraid to sleep just cuz im afraid of my dreams. and i thought dreams were supposed to be pleasant. . .

so if i've been treating people bad lately, im sorry. but i cant handle people lately because i cant even handle my own situations. i just need to rant. i just want a break from it all.

yesterday was halloween ! i went as the lovely silk spectre from watchmen. i la la love my costume so much, i could easily wear it everyday. tho, i dont think people would enjoy seeing a superhero walking around all the time. but id totally do that just because i love it so much.



yeah so, i went trick or treating during the day with jack. melanie didnt go because she was "sick". bull. annnyyyyway, we got some candy and such then we came home. me and the family went to my godmother's party shortly after. that was pretty fun. but im still tired. boo.

today was already productive, and i've only been up for about two hours, which is lovely. i finished all of my homework for the weekend. so today i can just chill. i might do my hair. maybe bleach it underneath and redye the top red? maybe hints of black? hmm. i dont know. decisions, decisions ! but i know im not getting rid of the red. i love having red hair and once you get rid of it, it's a biiiiiitch to get back. i hate having to make decisions about my hair color.